[PRESSURE SERIES] MISTAKE #2: LEAVING YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE TO CHANCE
Posted by Renita on Sunday, October 16, 2011
Confidence – it’s the linchpin to your success and how much you achieve. It’s what spurs you to take risks, overcome obstacles and enjoy challenges. It inspires others to have confidence in you and follow your lead.
So the biggest mistake high-achievers can make with their confidence is leaving it up to chance – acting as if it’s out of their control and letting it be dictated by external circumstances. VCs praised your pitch deck? Confidence rises! You flub the numbers in the presentation? Confidence falls! Up, down, up, down, that’s the rollercoaster approach to being on top of your game.
GET OFF THE ROLLERCOASTER
With this approach, it’s no wonder you feel reactive and out of control. And when you’re aiming high, the swings feel even more volatile and unpredictable.
To be clear, confidence is NOT a belief in your ability to always do everything perfectly or that you will never have setbacks.
Rather, true self-confidence is a feeling of assurance in and appreciation of your own worth, abilities and power – an unshakeable belief in your ability to handle whatever happens.
When you take control of your confidence, fear and mistakes have no power over you because your confidence is not based on things being easy or going just the way you planned.
WHAT TO DO
1. Make a promise.
Unshakeable belief in yourself isn’t something that happens in one dramatic fell swoop; you build it one small step at a time. Think of each step toward your goal as a promise you make to yourself, whether it’s eating a healthy salad instead of a slice of pizza for lunch, or getting to work 15 minutes early to prepare for the weekly meeting. Each time you fulfill a promise to yourself, it pumps up your self-belief and gives you confidence to tackle the next challenge.
2. Get uncomfortable.
Whether it’s following up with a moody client today (instead of tomorrow) or speaking up in a boisterous meeting, do whatever makes you feel that inner pushback — knowing that you took control and proactively stepped out of your comfort zone will boost your confidence like nothing else.
Tomorrow, I’ll be back with a lesson on what you need to focus on when you’re under pressure.
See you then,