How To Feel Less Defensive

“Have you ever been incarcerated?” When I was mentoring at Defy Ventures, an organization that trains formerly incarcerated individuals for employment and entrepreneurship, I learned that that was the question participants dreaded most in a job interview (and understandably so, since it often meant the end of the interview). Though, for most of us, the question we dread being asked may not be as damning, we all have one that puts a pit in our stomach: What’s your market traction? […]

Are You Mentally Tough Enough to Suck?

Recently, I’ve gotten into rock climbing. Well, actually, I’ve only done it a handful of times and I live in New York City, so it’s  on manmade walls at an indoor gym called Brooklyn Boulders. It’s cool and trendy and I like the idea of it as an exercise in mental toughness — except that it’s really, really hard. You’re perched at awkward angles, at risk of falling if you miss the next hold, while your fingers go numb from their death grip […]

How To Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

The Navy SEALs have a saying: “Get comfortable being uncomfortable.” Sounds like an oxymoron but, of course, if we want to grow, we need to get used to being outside our comfort zone. The thing is, our modern lives are all about ease and instant gratification. We don’t like the discomfort of a slow Internet connection, much less voluntarily exposing ourselves to potential rejection or failure. But that’s not where the magic – the growth, the learning – happens. So […]

Effort Is Not A Dirty Word: Five Ways You Get A Big Payback

“Lose 10 pounds in 10 days — without diet or exercise!” “Win the lottery, live a life of ease!” “Click here to meet the man of your dreams! Poof! Just like that, we’re rich, thin, in love and, presumably, happy. Except…we’re not. And yet, each time we fall for – or are at least tempted by — the lure of the quick fix because we want to believe that we can have it all, instantly, without breaking a sweat. Why […]